It’s no secret that when you have an anxiety disorder, it can oftentimes be difficult to even muster the courage and motivation to leave the house. Yet it seems as if the more we choose to stay in our comfort zone (or inside the house, that is), we begin to feel even more isolated and anxious. Agoraphobia, a phobia in which the individual fears leaving the home and being in unfamiliar places, is common amongst those who suffer from anxiety. While it may seem easier to give into such fears, grab some junk food and stay in bed all day, doing so will only exacerbate anxious feelings. Now I’m not saying that in order to treat your agoraphobia, all you need to do is go out and do something spontaneous and crazy, but gradually working on leaving house more and more is one of the most crucial steps in treatment.
Luckily for us anxiety suffers, it’s widely known that nothing is never as scary as we may to perceive it to be, and that also applies to the occasionally daunting task of leaving the house. Yet the more we stay cooped up in the comfort of our own homes, the longer we will prolong the fear of what may happen if we (in a spurt of courage) do decide to leave the house. As someone who has dealt with various different anxiety disorders over the span of 10 years, I’m guilty of staying way within my comfort zone and choosing not to leave my bedroom. But, fairly recently, I’ve had a sort of epiphany- the more I stay in the house, the worse I feel. So, in a desperate leap of faith to feel less anxious, I began to gradually force myself to begin to return to my social life, which I had put on some sort of anxiety-induced hiatus. Was it quick and easy, as we all may hope for it to be? Honestly, no. It was difficult at first, and it took a while for me to begin feeling more comfortable outside my home. Yet the more that I stayed outside of my home, the more I realized that all my catastrophic worries about what may happen were unrealistic. And if you’re interested in doing the same, all it takes is a leap of faith. You may find that the road to start your outside exposure is bumpier than you expected it to be, but in order for it to be effective, you have to stick with it. Here are some tips that you may find helpful along the way:
- NOTHING IS AS SCARY AS WE MAY PERCEIVE IT TO BE. Say that someone chose to stay inside their home because they were socially anxious, and believed that they were incapable of carrying out any successful social exchanges. Now imagine that one day, while out running errands, this someone runs into a familiar high school friend that they hadn’t seen in years, and to their disbelief, has a smooth and engaging conversation with them. This situation can often apply to just about any anxiety-producing situation that you can think of- once we face our fears, we will most likely find that there was nothing to be so afraid of.
- NO ONE WILL REALIZE THAT YOU’RE FEELING ANXIOUS, EXCEPT YOURSELF. If one of the reasons that you avoid going out is because you fear those around you will realize that you’re feeling anxious and will think you’re crazy or strange, please do not let this hold you back. A stranger will have absolutely no idea that you’re panicking, no matter how apparent you may think your pounding heart and sweaty palms may be.
- THE MORE YOU DO IT, THE EASIER IT WILL GET. Just like anything else that requires practice, the more time you spending working on something, the more skilled you will get. Sure, you may initially find that going out isn’t easy, yet the more you allow yourself to do it, the more comfortable you will feel and the less agoraphobia will be on your mind.
- DEVELOP YOUR OWN SET OF “TOOLS”. As you begin the journey of exposing yourself to the outside world, you may find that you get anxious. Yet the best way to combat the anxiety is to have artillery of tools you can use to combat it. While these comforting tools may vary from person to person, some ideas may include: a hair curler or stress ball (to squeeze when you’re feeling anxious), an ice-cold drink (panic attacks often cause hot flashes, so what better to have than something to cool you down?), sour candies or gum, a set of earphones and soothing music on your phone, or even having someone you trust go out with you, so you feel more safe. Once you have developed your personal set of tools, you will hopefully find reassurance in the fact that you have something to combat your anxiety if it happens to rear it’s ugly head.
- TAKE BABY STEPS. You won’t magically be cured of agoraphobia if you decide to spontaneously hop on a plane to a foreign country and step way out of your comfort zone. The key to exposing yourself to something that makes you anxious is to do so in small, manageable steps. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable when taking these steps, but you shouldn’t do anything so extreme that you find yourself white-knuckled and crying. You are in control of how fast (or how slow) you choose to expose yourself, so do so at a pace you feel comfortable with.
While these tips may not help everyone, I’m hoping that they provide some relief to someone out there who’s suffering, as after following these steps for three months, I found myself comfortably getting on a plane and flying to Bermuda for a week long vacation, something I never would have been able to do in the past without having a major panic attack and popping a Xanax. So if I can do that, I’m well beyond sure that you can do whatever you set your mind to. Best of luck, and remember that all it takes is a leap of faith.
By: Emma Kiely