Body image is something I have struggled with for many years.
I have gone through phases of obsessing to letting go and back to being obsessed. During high school it was the worst, the thought of body image never left my mind and that is not an exaggeration. Body image is such a hard thing to deal with because the thoughts are so incredibly powerful. Every time I would eat something I would instantly think I gained weight and would count up my calories in my mind over and over again. The mirror is another story… it is SO deceiving just as the scale is.
I have learned over the years that you should never base your worth on a number on the scale or what you see in the mirror.
It should be how you feel mentally and if you are comfortable in your body without using those as a gage. For one, scales vary so much. You could step on and then step off and back on and it will be a different number, you could have more water in you that is weighing you down, muscle weighs more than fat, and the time of day you weigh yourself makes the number different. You are your own worst critic, which is why the mirror is deceiving because you can easily convince yourself that you look “ugly” or “fat” when in reality you look perfectly normal.
Things to Remember:
- Food does NOT instantly turn into fat (food is fuel).
- Throw the scale away!!!!! There is no point in letting a couple numbers determine how your entire mood is.
- There is no way you can gain more than 2 pounds within a week.
- Pinching your “fat” does not mean you are fat.. it is extra skin and you need to stop thinking that makes you “ugly” because it makes you HUMAN. ALL OF US HAVE IT.
- Everyone has “rolls” when they sit down, it is just a part of the human body, once again.
FOOD IS FUEL is a huge concept and could not be truer. I started starving myself trying to lose as much weight as I could – and I did lose a lot but it did not make me happy whatsoever. I never thought enough pounds lost was enough so I was never satisfied. I never had the energy to do anything, not even get up and unload the dishwasher when my mom asked or lift the fork up to eat. My performance in sports suffered and I loved playing sports. I then started to fuel my body “properly” by tracking my food and let me tell you.. that is not the way to go if you are trying to overcome being obsessed with food. I thought it was but I also had a clouded mind and just wanted to be able to control my food. I then finally learned to just eat freely and this is the first year I have been able to do that.
A New Start
I am able to eat healthy during the week with what I am craving and being mindful and not what is within my macronutrient range or what my thoughts are saying to eat. I have always had “fear foods” which are foods I have not touched in over 4 years because my thoughts told me I would become fat if I ate even a bite of them. Well, now I can eat those things like French fries, bacon, ice cream, etc. I can order what I want when I go out. I have not weighed myself in over a year and I don’t plan to. This takes work but it is not impossible. Food is what gives you energy and it should not be a punishment and you should not punish yourself for eating what you want. When your mind tries to tell you that skinny is what people think is attractive and will get people to like you just remember:
- Those who truly love you will never comment or even think twice about what you weigh or look like.
- Limiting your food intake excessively will only lead to low energy, constant thoughts about calories, and unhappiness.
- Food tastes amazing and forcing yourself to not eat something you enjoy is not helping you in any way, it is only feeding the demons that are trying to take that away from you.
- Trying one “fear food” a week will help lead you to the ultimate goal of not being so worried every time you cannot control your food in a situation.
Every day, you need to make the choice to fight the voice in your head. It is not always easy, but having the right mindset when you wake up to not give into what it is saying, is a step in the right direction.
I never believed I could do those things or accomplished what I have. It was H*LL trying to get to where I am at but trust me, you CAN and WILL get to this point* Please reach out to me if you want more advice on this issue.
By: Jenny Osland, Anxiety In Teens Contributor